FROM SURVIVING TO THRIVING
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Whatever you're struggling with, I imagine I know how you feel.
If you are tired of doing life on your own and long to be in a healthy, loving partnership, I know how you feel. If you are confused and bemused by your single status and wondering if you'll ever find love, I know how you feel. If you feel bored or soul-dead in your career and long to feel passionate and alive again, I know how you feel. If you feel down, depressed, stressed, overwhelmed or burnt out, I know how you feel. If you are grieving because you have missed the chance to have children, feel ambivalent about parenthood or still hope to have kids but are running out of time, I know how you feel. If you are struggling to process early life wounds that impact your functioning today, leading to chronic self-sabotage and never-ending pain, I know how you feel. |
I have been there. I hear you. I see you. You are not alone. And there is hope.
Transformation is possible. It requires courage, determination and the right kind of support, but it is possible. My story attests to that.
Transformation is possible. It requires courage, determination and the right kind of support, but it is possible. My story attests to that.
MY STORY
I woke up on my 41st birthday in my lovely North London flat and watched my tears drop onto my pyjamas. I'd worked so hard for this - the high-flying career, the financial freedom and independence, the home of my own - so why did I feel so empty and alone? There was no partner to bring me breakfast in bed and no patter of tiny feet on the wooden floors.
Why hadn't I managed to make a relationship work? What had I been striving for all these years?
My love life was a disaster but I felt lost in my professional life too, despite an impressive CV and a job history that prompted people to say, 'Wow!'. I'd worked hard and climbed high. I'd travelled the world with prime ministers as a Reuters correspondent. I'd sipped champagne in Downing Street and the White House. I'd lived and worked as a foreign correspondent in Mexico and Brazil. I'd reported on earthquakes, conflicts, tsunamis and terrorist attacks.
Yet by my late 30s, I no longer felt fulfilled in that high-profile, high-adrenaline role. My authentic self was crying out to do something else, something more meaningful, more true to me. And my body and mind were desperate for a break from the punishing rhythm I subjected them to. I wanted to work at my own pace and find a work/life balance.
Why hadn't I managed to make a relationship work? What had I been striving for all these years?
My love life was a disaster but I felt lost in my professional life too, despite an impressive CV and a job history that prompted people to say, 'Wow!'. I'd worked hard and climbed high. I'd travelled the world with prime ministers as a Reuters correspondent. I'd sipped champagne in Downing Street and the White House. I'd lived and worked as a foreign correspondent in Mexico and Brazil. I'd reported on earthquakes, conflicts, tsunamis and terrorist attacks.
Yet by my late 30s, I no longer felt fulfilled in that high-profile, high-adrenaline role. My authentic self was crying out to do something else, something more meaningful, more true to me. And my body and mind were desperate for a break from the punishing rhythm I subjected them to. I wanted to work at my own pace and find a work/life balance.
FROM BREAKDOWN TO BREAKTHROUGH
On a Good Housekeeping magazine photoshoot
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The death of my father in my mid-30s hurtled me into a form of existential crisis. What's the point of my life? I asked on my knees. I went through burnout, breakdown and depression and, eventually, came out the other side. I let go of the masks, took off my armour, lowered my defences and asked for help. With support, I healed from self-harming behaviours including an eating disorder, binge drinking, workaholism, perfectionism and dysfunctional relationships with men who didn't value me or wouldn't commit. I went on a journey of recovery and self-discovery and I transformed myself, from the inside out. The results have been incredible. |
I am now married to a wonderful man and I live near the sea in Dorset, where you'll find me swimming or walking our dog most mornings. I have written a book called How to Fall in Love and I am writing a few more, and I've transformed my career. I now coach, write and speak from the heart, supporting others to transform their lives from the inside out and find fulfillment, balance, peace, wellbeing at work and a healthy and loving relationship that lasts.
It would be a privilege to work with you, write for you or speak to your organisation.
It would be a privilege to work with you, write for you or speak to your organisation.
OVERCOMING FEAR OF COMMITMENT
Just married!
Photo: Camilla Arnhold Photography
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I believe one of my biggest achievements to date is forming and maintaining a healthy and loving partnership with my husband, Bill. I see it as a miracle given my childhood wounds and my disastrous track record on the dating scene.
I am also incredibly grateful to have healed my eating disorder and found a good level of health and wellbeing (always a work in progress!). And I am proud that I finished and published my first book and built a coaching practice in which I show up authentically and impact other people's lives. |
HOW I WORK
I am a trauma-informed coach, which means I have the experience and expertise to understand the deep roots of your blocks and challenges and to support you to break through them.
I walk the walk - I have overcome many of the challenges my clients struggle with myself, including developmental trauma (this will always be an ongoing journey), a faulty relationship with myself, disordered eating, addictive and compulsive behaviours, self-harming relationship dynamics, depression and involuntarily singleness. I understand childhood trauma or complex PTSD, addiction, grief, loss, emotional pain, loneliness, childlessness, because I have experienced them myself and have studied them in depth.
I am an intuitive empath, with a gift for grasping what's really going on inside my clients' hearts and minds, behind the words and the mask, for understanding their patterns in work, love and life and for supporting them to make courageous changes.
I have a gift for holding space for groups of women and allowing hidden feelings and memories to surface. I lead by example, sharing my own vulnerabilities.
I have 20+ years of experience supporting others to change their relationships with themselves and form healthy relationships with others, first informally through support groups and networks and since 2017, professionally as a coach. I have a Diploma in Counselling and Psychotherapy Skills from the Westminster Pastoral Association in London, a degree from Oxford University and I'm a graduate and fellow of the School for Social Entrepreneurs. I speak fluent Spanish and reasonable Portuguese.
I've lectured at universities, spoken in schools and organisations and appeared on national television and radio, including on BBC Newsnight and Woman's Hour. My writing on self-love and relationships has been published in the national media, including Red, Psychologies, Good Housekeeping, The Daily Mail, The Sunday Times, the Guardian and Medium. I blog regularly on my own site, From Forty With Love, and have been sharing my journey there for 10+ years.
If you're looking for support to transform your life and your relationships, please don't hesitate to get in touch.
I walk the walk - I have overcome many of the challenges my clients struggle with myself, including developmental trauma (this will always be an ongoing journey), a faulty relationship with myself, disordered eating, addictive and compulsive behaviours, self-harming relationship dynamics, depression and involuntarily singleness. I understand childhood trauma or complex PTSD, addiction, grief, loss, emotional pain, loneliness, childlessness, because I have experienced them myself and have studied them in depth.
I am an intuitive empath, with a gift for grasping what's really going on inside my clients' hearts and minds, behind the words and the mask, for understanding their patterns in work, love and life and for supporting them to make courageous changes.
I have a gift for holding space for groups of women and allowing hidden feelings and memories to surface. I lead by example, sharing my own vulnerabilities.
I have 20+ years of experience supporting others to change their relationships with themselves and form healthy relationships with others, first informally through support groups and networks and since 2017, professionally as a coach. I have a Diploma in Counselling and Psychotherapy Skills from the Westminster Pastoral Association in London, a degree from Oxford University and I'm a graduate and fellow of the School for Social Entrepreneurs. I speak fluent Spanish and reasonable Portuguese.
I've lectured at universities, spoken in schools and organisations and appeared on national television and radio, including on BBC Newsnight and Woman's Hour. My writing on self-love and relationships has been published in the national media, including Red, Psychologies, Good Housekeeping, The Daily Mail, The Sunday Times, the Guardian and Medium. I blog regularly on my own site, From Forty With Love, and have been sharing my journey there for 10+ years.
If you're looking for support to transform your life and your relationships, please don't hesitate to get in touch.
If you'd like to share some of our wedding joy, take a look at this video: